Emotional Reactivity isn’t a Disorder, it’s Insecure Attachment.

What causes us to react to others and how long does it take for our bodies to calm?  How can we learn to heal so-called Reactive Attachment Disorder?
Reactivity is when we explode without choice into rage, grief, frustration, blame, and generally comes when we feel stressed, angry, or hurt and don’t have the self-regulation to NOT react impulsively.
The resources in this section help us learn the role implicit memory plays in reactivity, and how we can use empathy and resonance skills to transform reactivity into calm and connection, including healing attachment disorders, attachment issues and more.
What is self-resonance (and why does it matter?)

What is self-resonance (and why does it matter?)

We are given a sense that we make sense (or not) by our mothering people in a key phase of attachment bonding that occurs between 0 and 4 months old. We can use self-resonance to re-pattern attachment disruptions that may have occurred, and build a healthy secure...

Understanding Rage and Honoring Boundaries in Healing Trauma

Understanding Rage and Honoring Boundaries in Healing Trauma

In our culture, rage is considered mostly unacceptable, especially by women. But rage is one of our eight circuits of emotion and motivation. In this podcast interview, we discuss how rage helps us understand when our boundaries have been violated.  Why is rage so...

Truth Not Trauma: Understanding Relational Trauma and the Brain

Truth Not Trauma: Understanding Relational Trauma and the Brain

Once we understand how trauma impacts our mammalian circuitry (Jaak Panksepp's 8 circuits of emotion and motivation), we begin to see that so many things we've given ourselves a hard time for, are not static truths about us, but instead are simply the result of...

How marijuana impacts the brain and helps us with reactivity

How marijuana impacts the brain and helps us with reactivity

When I was 12 years old, I tried smoking marijuana for the first time. It was sunset in the winter in interior Alaska, where the colors of the sun going down are dusty pink and orange. I stood for a moment in front of a birch trunk, seeing the gold and white and...

How to Heal Trauma: Time-Traveling with Resonance

How to Heal Trauma: Time-Traveling with Resonance

Bringing resonance and accompaniment back to our wounded selves is the key to healing brains that have been fragmented by traumatic experience. This is called many names, for example: CRM Comprehensive Resource Model (CRM)®  I call it the Time Traveling with Resonance...

Guided meditation: Transform your brain with self-warmth

Guided meditation: Transform your brain with self-warmth

  My mission is to support self-warmth, joy and compassion by sharing the science of how our brains can change, I want to share a practice with you. Have you got 6 minutes? Find a spot to sit or lay down, and give yourself the gift of warm breath and sweet,...